


Keep me closer

by Nightyelfy



Category: Given (Anime), Given (Manga)
Genre: Affection, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Confessions, Conversations, Feelings, Fluff, Friendship, Funny, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, Heart-to-Heart, Kissing, M/M, Prompt Fic, Romance, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:55:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22615204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightyelfy/pseuds/Nightyelfy
Summary: Yayoi wants to go to a Halloween party, but since Take is unfortunately busy, she ropes Ritsuka into going with her. Not really wanting to go, especially alone, Ritsuka invites all the band.
Relationships: Itaya Shougo & Ueki Ryuu & Uenoyama Ritsuka, Kaji Akihiko/Nakayama Haruki, Satou Mafuyu/Uenoyama Ritsuka, Satou Mafuyu/Uenoyama Ritsuka/Yoshida Yuuki, Uenoyama Yayoi/Yatake Kouji
Comments: 6
Kudos: 131
Collections: Given Exchange - Winter 2020





	Keep me closer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [midnightseashell14](https://archiveofourown.org/users/midnightseashell14/gifts).



> Please do not re-post my work on other websites.

„After all the anticipation of this party, the bragging I did to my friends, and the planning that went into having matching costumes,” Yayoi huffs and puffs, each word uttered a bit louder and harsher than the previous. "I still can't believe it!" 

The sound of her voice echoes across the empty city street. It’s nearing dawn, but Ritsuka had no room to protest his sister’s decision to head out quite early that evening. 

„This party was supposed to be Take and I mingling as a couple and somehow,” Yayoi stops, her head turning briefly only to spot a somewhat distant and unbothered Ritsuka catching up to her, „I can’t believe it’s you I am stuck with!” she growls, not furious at her brother, but at the intricate ways in which the universe works. However, because her brother was there beside her, he proves to be an easier target than something as vast as the cosmos. 

Ritsuka shrugs, allowing his sister’s words to pass by him; too many outbursts have taught him to keep his tongue and wait for the tantrum to end. She will settle down once we get there, he thinks, too indecisive to say the words out loud.

„Could this maybe be a nightmare? Ouch!” she retreats, the pain pulsating from the spot she pinches. „Damn it.” 

„You do remember it was you who invited me to this party, right, Yayoi?” Ritsuka gives her an irritated glimpse as he passes her. „So don’t make it seem like I am ruining the evening for you. Besides, Take being called in to work at the last minute had nothing to do with me.”

„Shut up, Ritsuka,” Yayoi retorts, quick to anger just like her brother. „Let me complain so I can get it out of my system. I plan on having a great time tonight, and if this is something I need to do beforehand, then let it be so. You just man up and take it.”

„Right, right,” he shakes his head, a note of satisfaction in his voice.

The last of the day’s light is disappearing into the evening’s dark embrace. The two are walking side by side down the street, Yayoi’s steps slowly losing their weight. Aware of the pressing silence between them, the girl jolts and lifts her eyes to Ritsuka, her mind quick to race.

„By the way,” she follows, having regained much of her calm, „who was it that you invited again?”

Ritsuka’s heart stutters for a moment. That’s right, he thinks, I never told her anything. There are many things Yayoi suspects, but they never sat down and openly discussed their developing relationships. Regardless of their closeness as siblings, some topics are easier to address than others. 

„Ritsuka?” she inquires after a long moment of silence, his hesitation tempting her frustration once more.

„Ah, about that,” he eventually brings himself to say and goes to scratch the back of his neck, turning his head, looking to break the lingering gaze she cast upon him.

He opens his mouth to speak again, thinks for a moment, then closes it. There are many things he still doesn’t understand and that he doesn’t have words for. Bringing them up would raise more questions from his sister, and at that precise moment, he’d rather avoid being drawn into an argument. 

„Oh no,” Yayoi then stutters, making a concentrated effort to hide her distress, „Ritsuka, please tell me you haven’t invited — ”

At that point, she was determined to get the answer out of her brother no matter how much she had to shake him to snap him out of his trance.

„Uenoyama-kun?”

The voice is like honey, soothing, sweet, and fulfilling, and catches the attention of Yayoi, whose hand is on Ritsuka’s collar. The two siblings shift their eyes towards the source of the voice and spot Mafuyu sitting on a nearby fence. He is alone, and judging by the slightly bemused expression on his face, he has been waiting there for a while.

Once Mafuyu gets accustomed to the sharp contour of Ritsuka’s face, that confusion faded. His lips then curl gently, and Mafuyu reveals a smile so pleasant, it reaches Ritsuka’s heart, rendering him unable to remember what his sister was complaining about a moment ago.

„That boy,” Yayoi finishes, noticing brother’s flushed face; she sighs, finding it a bit too familiar. She retreats from his side as she hasn’t the patience to deal with him any longer. The girl then fixates her gaze on the house behind Mafuyu, the location of the party. 

„Ah, Haruki-san is here too,” Mafuyu points blankly to somewhere behind him. 

Ritsuka follows the direction he is gesturing towards and locates the person in question almost instantly. In the distance, a tall blond man wearing a long trench coat, a pair of vintage glasses, and a fashionable deerstalker is smoking peacefully. He must’ve spotted the three with the corner of his eyes, or felt them approaching because it was in that moment that he turns and waves to them, a broad, pleasant smile radiating from his lips.

„Wait a — what did you say?” Yayoi freezes in her step just as she passes Mafuyu only to turn to him, unease clawing at her heart. The boy flinches, taken aback by her startled expression. „Haruki Nakayama?” she repeats the name, her eyes widening. 

Mafuyu wastes no time and nods. 

„Oh no, if he is here that can only mean — ” Yayoi’s brow furrows, and shifts her head around, scanning the area.

„Ue-no-ya-MA!” the voice is deep and menacing; it’s coming from somewhere behind Ritsuka. Before the boy can make any connections in his mind as to who the mysterious voice belongs to or the intention behind the sinister tone, he feels a pair of hands planted firmly on his shoulders; the sudden contact causes Ritsuka to shout, his heart nearly jumping out of his chest. 

Trembling like a leaf under the tight grasp, Ritsuka is barely able to turn his head. He screams a second time after locking eyes with the eerie apparition and falls to the ground with a loud thump. In front of him, Akihiko starts laughing.

„Ah, damn; it was supposed to be _boo_ ,” Akihiko then sighs disappointedly. „My bad, my bad; you up for retrying that?”

Akihiko’s last-minute decision to accept the party invitation left him in need of improvisation. A white sweatshirt with an oversized hoodie covering his eyes, some white powder for the rest of his face and hands and black, tight pants to give the impression of floating; a ghost. And an effective one at that, judging by the catatonic state of his first victim. 

„He looks dead,” Akihiko concludes after taking note of the glazed expression and the paleness that overtake Ritsuka. „What do you think, detective?” he turns to Haruki, whom he spots is making his way towards them.

„What I think, Akihiko is that you overdid it this time,” Haruki stops beside him and shakes his head after delivering his observation.

„Uenoyama-kun, are you ok?” Mafuyu then steps in between his bandmates and friends and investigates the dark-haired boy who was trying to recollect his distraught self from the ground. 

The supernatural is not something Uenoyama is fond of in any way, moreover, he holds a significant fear for it. And now, after being made to face it, his fear deepened.

„Ghosts are pretty scary, aren’t they?” Mafuyu smiles, speaking softly as though conveying a thought rather than something he intended to put into words. 

Haruki and Akihiko each grab one of Ritsuka’s arms and pull him up, urging him forward. Some movement will do him good, Haruki thinks, praying silently that the boy will not suffer any mental scars.

„Akihiko,” Yayoi breathes, a faint trace of resentment in her voice and catches the gaze of the man just as he releases her brother. „I didn’t expect — well, I had no idea that...that Haruki and you; I mean, for tonight, that is, and — ” 

Despite her eagerness after not meeting him for a long while, the words won’t come out. Her thoughts become scrambled, and her heart unsettled after Akihiko rests his eyes a bit too heavily on her.

Haruki is caught switching between the two, and wonders if Akihiko is going to say something. Or maybe he should. He was the one who extended Mafuyu’s invitation to Akihiko also and, as such, felt responsible for the awkward encounter. Not to mention, there was yet another reason that made the pang of guilt hang heavily in his heart. With the passing of the seasons, his relationship with Akihiko has seen many ups and downs, and he always kept quiet about it. It was somewhat ironic, however, that even now, when things settled down, they have yet to say anything to their friends. While Haruki wasn’t entirely ready for such an announcement and would do everything to postpone it, he couldn’t be sure this is what Akihiko wanted as well. 

„I think it would be best if — ” Haruki begins, his mouth dry.

„Let’s have some fun tonight, shall we? That’s why we are here, after all,” Akihiko cuts in and grins, managing to disperse some of Haruki’s unease. 

„I’ll see you inside then,” Yayoi says, careful to sound calm. Having her brother by her side for the night instead of Take was a notion she almost made peace with, but after seeing the rest of his merry band, the whirlwind inside of her is gathering speed once more. I need a drink, Yayoi thinks, or two. And probably just as many of her friends’ ears lent to her woes.

Akihiko huffs out a laugh spotting Yayoi’s reaction. That desire to look cool, calm, and collected in the face of a confrontation is all too familiar. The blond man beside him is known to deliver the exact attitude when cornered. Even now, Haruki is standing up straight, with an unfazed expression even if his knees are shaking. That was too close, Haruki thinks.

As Yayoi departs from before him, Akihiko turns to Uenoyama, who is now leaning on Mafuyu’s shoulder; he is finally starting to get some color back in his cheeks. He smirks mischievously and then pulls on Haruki’s long coat to redirect his attention. With his hands in the air, Akihiko is getting ready to make his way sneakily towards Uenoyama once more.

Haruki’s gaze is focused on Yayoi as she's climbing the stairs to the patio. He wakes from his stare once nudged but needs a moment to make sense of Akihiko’s gesture. 

„If any of our band members die,” Haruki clears his throat and crosses his arms, after deciphering Akihiko’s impish plan, „we will have to disband.” 

Akihiko freezes. He then turns and nods submissively to Haruki. For now, Akihiko thinks, narrowing his eyes.

Even with Mafuyu by his side, Haruki notices how Uenoyama wobbles or jolts whenever he feels Akihiko leaning a bit too close to him. Not the mental scars, Haruki pleads in his mind, holding in a gasp, please, anything but that.

„So, what’s with the vampire get-up, Mafuyu?” Akihiko turns to the boy whose long cape is fluttering, the wind playfully striking at it as he is walking in front of him. „Some sort of fairy would’ve been more appropriate for you, I think.”

„I have a lot in common with vampires,” Mafuyu explains cautiously, his tone darkened slightly after Akihiko's comment.

Akihiko and Haruki swap expressions, silently expecting one of them to offer the other an explanation as to the boy’s bizarre statement. 

„I don’t see it,” Akihiko continues, rubbing his chin inquisitively, studying the entirety of Mafuyu’s outfit — a dark red shirt underneath a brown vest, a black cape around his shoulders, hair neatly slicked back. „Detective, how’s it looking from your side?” he then playfully nudges Haruki, who was walking to his left.

Haruki wasn’t expecting the gesture and was close to stumbling. He readjusts himself, and turns to Akihiko, about to launch a protest. His intention is quickly extinguished, however, when he meets Akihiko’s striking eyes; they always knew how to settle his troubled soul, regardless of the environment or situation. And this time is no exception.

„Mafuyu,” Haruki follows, gaze flickering to the red-head now with a burning curiosity, „do you mean to say you live in a castle in the middle of some dark woods and have to suck the blood of the innocent to stay alive?”

Mafuyu shakes his head, bringing his thoughts back to the present and stares down. „I am a bit of a loner, and I don’t like garlic.”

Akihiko blinks repeatedly. He is at a loose end, trying to make sense of the boy’s words, which were uttered with such a severe tone, he expects lighting to strike in the distance at any moment.

„Ah, Mafuyu, that is nowhere near the same,” Haruki points hopefully, wishing to steer the boy away from such a terrifying comparison. „Also, that’s not a lot in common either.”

Mafuyu is a ray of sunshine too often caught behind dark clouds, Haruki thinks, but with a little help, and enough time, even the worst of storms passes. Haruki only wants to speed up if not encourage such a process whenever he feels he can.

„But you must know that’s not true,” Uenoyama rebukes, new energy to him after hearing Mafuyu’s dark tone. „I mean, they aren’t real.”

He came back from the dead, Haruki and Akihiko think, staring at Uenoyama’s unflinching expression, which was in contradiction with the one he was wearing before.

„They are. In Romania, that is,” Mafuyu argues, zeal outlining his eyes. 

„I bet you don’t even know where that is on the map,” Uenoyama makes a noise indicative of slight annoyance. He usually appreciates Mafuyu’s animated persona, but this time around, he doesn’t want to encourage his gloomy side. 

„You are the one to speak, Uenoyama,” Akihiko points out wryly. „Wasn’t geography a subject you failed? Or was it history? Hard to keep track of your many achievements.”

„I knew it was a mistake to tell you about my school results, Kaji-san,” Uenoyama speaks louder than before, his wounded pride quick to ignite him. It’s both, Uenoyama thinks and sighs, I’m failing both. 

„It’s where Transylvania is,” Mafuyu presses, taking the conversation a bit too seriously. 

„That doesn’t narrow it down at all,” Haruki shakes his head, surprised at how such a silly topic is making the boy whose body language is always small and contained come out of his shell, arguing with a passion that he almost came to envy.

Akihiko is holding onto his stomach, struggling to drown his laughs. While he appreciates Haruki’s investigational effort just as much as Mafuyu’s unexpected yet honest reply, he can’t contain his amusement.

„What about you, Uenoyama?” Akihiko asks, switching topics after turning to the boy in question. He feels that they came down a bit too harshly on Mafuyu, who was now blushing under the prospect of having to continue the debate. 

They are standing on the front porch of the house where the party is held, bundled together as though debating something of crucial importance, intrigue and curiosity glowing in their eyes. The three are now waiting with bated breath the answer to Akihiko’s question.

„Space Cowboy,” he finally gives it without his usual arrogance.

The three eye Uenoyama up and down, scrutinizing everything they saw. A fashionable light blue shirt underneath a waist-length dark brown leather jacket, a pair of knee-high boots, slim-fit black trousers, and a belt with a bunch of leather straps wrapped around his waist. 

„Just use your damn imagination!” Uenoyama cries out, growing uncomfortable with their contemplative and prolonged humming.

„Was a regular cowboy not glamorous enough for you, boy wonder?” Akihiko teases, leaning forward and patting Uenoyama on the head as if comforting a troubled child.

Uenoyama is quick to click his tongue, thinking Akihiko already caused enough damage to his self-esteem for one night. He pushes Akihiko’s hand to the side and crosses his arms, trying, at the same time, to block out Haruki’s chuckles. Unbeknownst to Uenoyama, however, his imposing posture, flustered yet stern expression, and unique outfit spark a fire in Mafuyu. His eyes brighten as soon as the warmth from within begins spreading throughout his entire body.

„I—I think Uenoyama-kun looks cool.” 

They all turn to Mafuyu, startled by his loud and steadfast comment. It's not until both Akihiko and Haruki shift their narrowed yet extremely amused eyes to Uenoyama that they notice even his ears turned red; Mafuyu manages to make his heart beat a bit too fast again and with nothing but a timely intervention.

They knock on the door and are greeted by the host of the party. She recognizes Ritsuka and warmly invites them inside. 

Yayoi is making her way past the hallway when she locks eyes with the four boys. She smiles briefly at them and then proceeds with her affair; she can’t bring herself to stop and chat. Not yet, at least. 

There are multiple reasons for this party as the boys quickly find out, the host quite a social and energic girl, dressed appropriately as a ballerina; a get together before one of her friends goes abroad to attend university, a birthday party for another one of her close group of acquaintances and last but not least, it is Halloween. 

Any reason for the kids to get dressed up these days, Haruki thinks and smiles. He winces, driving those thoughts away. I am still young; I can’t be thinking like an old man, he repeats to himself, also struggling to convince himself of the matter. 

Eager for some comfort or a distraction, he turns to the side and opens his mouth to speak. But there was nobody there; Akihiko had disappeared. „The dance floor or the bar,” Haruki murmurs after a long moment. He stands up straight, readjusting the coat on his shoulders, and then proceeds to follow in Akihiko’s footsteps. 

„The bar,” Uenoyama catches Haruki’s last words and repeats them, his eyes surveying the house’s immediate layout. 

The place is fancy and considerably sizeable from the outside, but once inside, that impression only gets amplified. The rooms are spacious and minimally decorated, yet incredibly stylish. The hallway leads straight into a big living room, where most people are gathered, chatting away, or attempting to push each other onto the dance floor. At the end of it and to the right is an open kitchen area with an island counter, which is used as a bar. Alcohol bottles of all sizes, types, and colors are scattered around the counter, next to some tall glasses, a deep bowl of ice, and a cutting board with freshly sliced lemon halves. 

Uenoyama catches himself staring, but returns to the present when he senses the boy next to him twitching. Mafuyu's rubbing his arm nervously with his hand after being struck by the same sight Uenoyama was focusing on a moment ago.

Uenoyama turns to him and opens his mouth to speak, but fears he has already taken too much time to erase any sign of indecisiveness. Mafuyu lifts his eyes at him, and unable to find what he needs, he retreats and faces away.

„It’s fine; it’s not like the world will stop turning or change because of me. It’s just something I need to learn to deal with,” Maufyu speaks dryly, feigning a smile.

Uenoyama is at a loss for words. It unsettles him to see how much the sight of the bar affected Mafuyu’s disposition. 

„Right,” Uenoyama eventually utters, watching as the boy departs from his side. 

Having reached the legal drinking age was a real celebration for Uenoyama’s friends, Ueki and Itaya, one that almost rivaled Christmas. And seeing them so happy to be able to buy a beer without having to use a fake ID made him unable to resist joining in their celebration. But that was not the case with Mafuyu; he never went to the bar with them; he would excuse himself from the table whenever Haruki or Akihiko would treat the two of them to a beer, and buying alcohol was something Mafuyu never offered to do. While he noticed Mafuyu’s odd reticence towards alcohol, Uenoyama postponed ever asking him to justify himself. And because of that, there came a time in which it would’ve been awkward even to mention it. 

Everybody drinks; most get drunk; quite a few get hangovers. Some deal with it better than others, but that’s no reason to hate it, Uenoyama thinks, and if nothing else, it helps make the awkwardness disappear. Uenoyama exhales slowly, defeated by his thoughts. He shakes them away, and with a different air about him, he proceeds to follow in Mafuyu’s footsteps.

Uenoyama makes his way past some people, bowing his head politely and saluting when greeted, his uneasiness growing with each girl who glances a bit too insistingly at him. Everybody here knows my sister, Uenoyama thinks, this is her best friend’s house, but they were expecting to see Take. 

„Nice of you to join us,” Haruki says and raises his glass towards Uenoyama as soon as he arrives in the kitchen. „For a minute there, I thought your sister snatched you by the ear or something.” 

Haruki is leaning against a counter and is joyfully watching as Akihiko and Mafuyu are hovering over a secluded corner of the kitchen. 

„Ah, about earlier,” Uenoyama approaches, scratching the back of his neck, „she was just a bit — ”

„It’s fine,” Haruki smiles, dismissing Uenoyama’s need to excuse his sister’s crude behavior, „she was surprised to see us, that’s all. But I should thank her, come to think of it. She could’ve had us kicked out for crashing the party.”

Mafuyu’s eyes are sparkling, and next to him, Akihiko's licking his lips and rubbing his hands together. Neither can decide which sugary treat to start with. The counter before them is overflowing with trays of freshly baked cupcakes with caramel icing, chocolate chip and blueberry muffins, mini vanilla cakes and fruit tarts, caramelized apples and chocolate-covered strawberries, bowls of sweets and candy bars, honey-glazed croissants, peanut butter cookies and multicolored macaroons in a fancy three-tier cake stand. Uenoyama chooses to keep his distance for the moment, even though the pleasant aroma of the baked good is making him swallow even from afar. 

Uenoyama narrows his eyes as he was switching between Akihiko and Mafuyu and Haruki. Haruki is standing by the side wide-eyed, staring at Akihiko, a smile hiding at the corner of his mouth. There is something in the way Haruki watches over the other two that he can’t decipher, and for whatever reason, can’t dismiss either. 

Haruki eventually notices Uenoyama’s scrutinizing gaze and gulps his glass of gin and tonic only to jump over to the bar-counter and prepare another one. Even if he is fearful that Uenoyama might start suspecting something, in a way, he can’t help it; Haruki never met that sweet-tooth version of Akihiko before, his heart refusing to settle. He shouldn’t be allowed to be so cute, he thinks, fighting his blushing cheeks. 

Uenoyama shrugs as his eyes are drawn to Mafuyu once more. The boy is bouncing, eagerly reaching forward each time he convinces himself he found the sweet treat of his liking but ends up retreating before actually grabbing one. It’s been a while since I’ve seen him so lively, Uenoyama thinks. He huffs out a laugh, amused, seeing the two of them drooling over so many sweets like children in the candy aisle of a convenience store.

Mafuyu gasps loudly and picks up a cupcake. He stares at it for a while, rotating it from side to side, fascinated to understand all of its intricacies. Once satisfied with his investigation, he turns, looking around as though in search of something. Or someone. 

He locks eyes with Uenoyama, and it’s then his shoulders relax. „This one,” Mafuyu rushes over, enthusiasm animating his steps.

Mafuyu reveals his palms to Uenoyama, who found it impossible not to compare him to a proud pome that was tasked with bringing back a stick after a game of fetch.

„What about it?” Uenoyama asks blandly after investigating the cupcake Mafuyu presented.

„It’s cute,” he says softly. „And I want to share it with you.”

Uenoyama’s heart misses a beat. He clenches his chest with one hand and places the other on Mafuyu’s shoulder, leaning on him as he pushes his head down. The kind of power Mafuyu has over him is terrifying, and he needs a moment to draw breath and regain his composure. He has already died once that day and now was almost the second time. There won’t be a third, Uenoyama thinks critically.

„Hey, Haruki,” Akihiko clears his throat and points to the treats in front of him, „do you want a cupcake?”

„No, thank you,” he replies and presents the tall glass of gin and tonic he is savoring.

„A muffin, then?” Akihiko insists, eyeing the various assortments, wondering which one would suit Haruki’s taste.

„No, no, it’s fine.”

„Eh, what do you mean ‚no’?” Akihiko rebukes, indignation on his lips. „Why not?”

„I don’t want any pastries.”

„What about some candy?”

„Akihiko, I thought I told you — ” Haruki says, faintly annoyed.

„I’m just messing around,” he interrupts and approaches Haruki, so close to him, he can smell the gin on his breath. 

Akihiko presses to shrink the distance between them. Haruki freezes, his eyes locked on the Akihiko’s parted lips. He is going to kiss me, he thinks, the sound of his pounding heart dampening all the other noises around him.

„Ah, it’s time for a smoke break,” Akihiko retracts in the last moments and turns to the nearest exit, with a relaxed air about him.

Haruki’s knees go weak, and he crumbles to the floor. „That guy is going to be the death of me,” he whimpers and covers his face with his hands to hide his flushed expression.

Attending the party are many mythological beings, either with wings, horns or halos, a few nurses, a couple of superheroes, police officers and firefighters, two chefs, and a pirate. Yayoi is distraught the first time she locks eyes with the person wearing the pirate costume since it’s in contradiction with her sailor theme. Instinctively, that person gets marked as her nemesis, much to the man’s confusion as to the reason behind her irked glances thrown his way now and again.

The party carries on. Just as the music gets louder, the glasses require more refills with each song that ends, and another one begins. 

Haruki is enjoying a cigarette outside, after having befriended half the attending guests with his warm and friendly presence. Akihiko quickly finds comfort either at the bar or by the laptop, which was connected to a soundboard, willing to try his hand at both mixology and DJ-ing. 

As for Uenoyama, after he is dragged to the side by his sister to explain the newly developed feud between her and the pirate, he loses track of Mafuyu. The last time he saw him, he was surrounded by a couple of girls. They were loud when they asked him to take a picture with them or of them; Uenoyama can’t remember, but regardless of their request, Mafuyu accepted. 

Where could he have gone to, Uenoyama ponders. He escapes his sister’s clutches after she excuses herself to get a refill on her drink and is now checking the crowd around him for the red-haired boy. Every time he catches sight of anybody with a black cape, he jolts, quick to approach the person. However, Mafuyu isn’t any of those people. 

We were supposed to hang out together, that’s why we came here, Uenoyama thinks irritably, tapping his foot. Or well, that’s why I invited him; I wanted to spend some time with him. We have our exams coming up, and we'll be busy studying. Band practice is also on hold until after the exams and then the holiday season is starting. There’s no way we'll be able to meet during that period either. 

Uenoyama gasps, the conclusion he reaches causing his heart to twinge. Unwilling to give in, he surfaces from his thoughts by clenching his fist. I will find him, no matter what, he promises.

He crosses the living room two times, and the kitchen and the hallway three times. He sticks his head outside a nearby window, but there is nobody there. Too cold to be out unless you are a smoker, he concludes noticing the vigorous way in which some guests stirred on the patio, moving from one leg to the other to keep warm.

Uenoyama then turns, his heart racing, and his worries towering high above his head. I can’t help but feel responsible for Mafuyu, Uenoyama thinks. 

Uenoyama holds his head in his hands, grumbling and mumbling words that only make sense to him. Fortunately, his rant was not noticed by anybody else but the person who stopped to his side and was observing him for a long moment. A boy, two centimeters smaller than him, his hair messier than it has ever been despite the grueling effort he put in giving it a style before heading out to the party that evening. 

„Uenoyama-kun, are you ok?” Mafuyu asks and tilts his head, unable to understand his frustration.

„Mafuyu!” Uenoyama jumps. He would’ve thrown his arms around the boy were it not for a hesitation, a slight pause. „I—I was just wondering, well, where have you been?” he retreats and says after clearing his throat.

„Toilet,” Mafuyu points to a door which was so well hidden, Uenoyama needed a few moments to spot it. „And then the kitchen. I wanted something to drink.”

Uenoyama sighs at his clumsiness. In his erratic approach, it slipped his mind that every house has such a utility room.

„This orange juice is good, the girls recommended I give it a try, but there’s something funny about it. Do you want to take a sip?” Mafuyu pushes his cup to Uenoyama’s lips, and it’s then that the strong smell of the drink hits him.

„Um, how much of this did you drink?” Uenoyama asks, affecting a politely bland tone as not to intimidate nor panic the boy.

„Orange juice?” Mafuyu takes a moment and lifts his eyes to the ceiling before answering. „This is the third cup.”

„Mafuyu, that's not — ” Uenoyama begins to say, but the crowd explodes around him. 

It’s nearing midnight, and that’s when everything gets louder and crazier. The two were standing right next to the dancing floor when all of a sudden, it got invaded from all sides. Much to Uenoyama’s exasperation, during the waves of people moving back and forth, Mafuyu is approached by one of the three girls from before. Some sort of witch, Uenoyama thinks, scrutinizing her outfit. She asks Mafuyu something, and before the boy could make sense of her words, he is being dragged away. 

Uenoyama follows him with his eyes, and shortly enough, Mafuyu is stuck in between the witch and her friends. Whatever they said to him, it worked; they convinced him to dance with them. And the orange juice made Mafuyu unable to refuse.

He was right in front of me, and I lost him once more, Uenoyama thinks. The boy sighs, defeated. Thinking he shouldn’t be clingy or dramatic about it, he forces himself not to sulk too much. That’s when the prospect of the bar appears before him, and not before long, Uenoyama leaves the dancing floor and heads to the kitchen area. 

Uenoyama picks up a beer and drinks half of it in one go. He then turns to check on the status of the dancers, and seeing the way Mafuyu’s face is glistening under the artificial and colorful lights makes his heart heavy. The girls are dancing with him and around him, smiling, making him laugh, whispering in his ear, holding onto his cape. Don’t think about it, don’t think about it; we are here to have fun, Uenoyama reminds himself and drinks the other half of the beer. He opens another one and leans against the counter, his eyes glued to the dance floor.

„Stop ogling like a stalker. Just go to him.” 

The voice is deep and coming from somewhere nearby. Uenoyama is struck by a profound sense of deja vu, which sends a shiver down his spine.

„Kaji-san! Where did you come from?” Uenoyama asks after spotting the tall ghost next to him, adjusting the hood on his face. 

Despite having convinced himself there was nothing to fear, Uenoyama is still startled by his costume. Or could it just be Kaji-san’s scary face, he ponders as he regains his composure.

„Where all ghosts come from, I suppose,” Akihiko grins. He then turns round to busy himself with another dry whiskey, after which he leans on the counter, next to Uenoyama.

Uenoyama sighs and allows the conversation to lull. He exhales slowly to settle his thoughts, but the sight of the dance floor isn’t allowing him to think of anything else. 

„I can’t do that,” Uenoyama frowns and lifts his gaze.

Akihiko glances at him, smiling faintly. „It’s not like anybody cares. Look at them; they're drunk.” 

Uenoyama’s heartache was something that resonated with him. All too familiar, Akihiko thinks. The distance that was expected to be put between him and the person he likes was something that bothered him too at one point. Afterwhich he learned not to care anymore, but then again, that’s just something he told himself. Akihiko always cared; that was his secret.

However, despite Akihiko’s encouragement, that was not what was bothering Uenoyama. This was the first time they all went out to such a big party, where alcohol was served and where Mafuyu had a drink, even if he is still none the wiser about it. In a way, his worries were justified even if Akihiko was hasty in drawing conclusions.

„Kaji-san, how do you get over it?” Uenyoama asks irritably, lifting his head. „I mean when you know your partner had an important ex in their life.”

„An ex is an ex for a reason,” Akihiko says, suppressing a snicker. Kids, he thinks slightly amused. „You are the boyfriend now, so do your best.” 

„I know this isn't something that should be on my mind at this time, but I still don’t — ” Uenoyama mutters, irritation pulsating from within.

„Ah, that’s my cue,” Akihiko interrupts and vanishes from beside him just as fast as he appeared. 

Uenoyama tried to predict his route and destination, but he lost sight of him almost instantly, the frenzy of the crowd swallowing him whole.

_An ex is an ex._

It might’ve been easy for his friend to speak without actually understanding Uenoyama’s unease, but maybe he didn’t have to; just a little bit was enough. And despite the distant way in which Akihiko delivered his advice, it was sufficient to spur on his heart. 

Uenoyama then takes a deep breath. One step in front of the other, and he crosses the room. He is clumsily making his way through the people on the dance floor, dodging elbows and daring dance moves, but he is determined and stops only when he finds the person he had his eyes on the whole time. 

Mafuyu is in front of him, and he has never been more breathtaking. Or maybe on stage, when he first sang. But now, not only is he singing over the song that is playing, but he is also dancing. And the way he moves, gently, soothingly and yet daring, is causing Uenoyama’s rationality to stagger.

_Just go to him._

He lifts his hand and reaches for Mafuyu, anguish still clutching at him. Mafuyu notices and decides to allow Uenoyama to dictate the way their encounter is going to go. He is willing to wait, curious at the same time, to see what Uenoyama wants to do.

_You are the boyfriend now._

Uenoyama grabs Mafuyu by his sleeve, somewhere below the elbow, and inches closer to him. Mafuyu moves his eyes to where his hand is grasping. His mouth twitches, almost smiling.

_Do your best._

Mafuyu redirects his eyes to Uenoyama’s, and Uenoyama smiles back. Not entirely hugging, not actually touching, they stay close to each other, pretending to dance, feigning listening to the music, and actively dismissing the presence of the crowd around them. For a while, they are alone in the room, in the whole world. And it’s perfect. 

„What do you want to do, Uenoyama-kun?” Mafuyu bridges the distance between them and whispers in his ear, after which he retreats.

Uenoyama’s lower lip is trembling as he froze with his mouth open. His ear is burning, Mafuyu’s breath setting it ablaze.

„Just tell me,” Mafuyu insists after he lifts himself and whispers in Uenoyama’s other ear, and the same effect occurs.

Uenoyama snaps back to reality after a long moment. He leans to Mafuyu and whispers one word in his ear. Mafuyu’s face lights up, and he giggles and plants his forehead into Uenoyama’s chest. 

Shit, this is embarrassing; there’s no way he won’t hear, Uenoyama thinks. His heart was racing, the contact of Mafuyu’s touch sending a wave of heat throughout his body. Uenoyama feels close to combusting. While he can’t apprehend Mafuyu’s bravery, he admires it and wishes he could make it his own if even for a moment.

„I want to talk to you,” Mafuyu then grabs Uenoyama by the hand and pulls him away, passing through the crowds with great ease. Uenoyama concedes defeat before Mafuyu’s tenacity and allows himself to be taken wherever it is the boy desires to go.

They keep walking until they reach the front door. Mafuyu then opens the door, unwilling to give them time to put on their shoes. Impatient and determined, Uenoyama thinks, exhilarated by the energy Mafuyu was displaying. And not to mention the warmth his hand is emanating, still holding tightly onto his own.

„Is everything ok? Are you unwell?” Uenoyama asks, closing the door behind them. 

He tilts his head, trying to investigate Mafuyu’s face. Once he gets a glance at it, he swallows thinking he'd give anything to capture that sight forever; Mafuyu’s reddened cheeks, his glazed eyes, which for some unknown reason are approaching him at a rapid speed.

„Mafuyu, is there something that you — ”

Mafuyu interrupts him by pushing himself forward. He presses his lips against Uenoyama’s and stays like that for a while, leaving him breathless despite the tamed nature of their kiss.

„What was that about?” Uenoyama asks accusingly after Mafuyu retreats from his lips.

„Your wish.”

Too blunt, Uenoyama thinks and jolts. „I thought you said talk,” he shakes his head, fighting his stutter.

„And I thought you said kiss,” Mafuyu smiles shyly.

Uenoyama clicks his tongue, his gaze stuck onto the boy before him. The longer he stares at him, the more he fears he might drown in Mafuyu’s eyes. He’s caught between dither and temptation when he exhales sharply and reaches for Mafuyu’s hand. But Mafuyu’s expression is so pleasant and alluring, he found himself unable to resist its spell. „Come here,” Uenoyama pulls Mafuyu away from the front porch. 

They go to a side of the house, which the street lamps fail to illuminate adequately. They stop by the bench, under the house’s shadow. Uenoyama can hear Mafuyu panting, the abrupt escape putting its toll on him. He turns to the boy and pushes his hand against Mafuyu’s cheek. He allows a moment for Mafuyu to catch his breath, but there’s only so much more he can bear. Uenoyama narrows his eyes and then lifts Mafuyu’s chin with the tips of his fingers. 

It’s true, what Mafuyu said, Uenoyama thinks. He then closes his eyes just as he is about to rest his lips on Mafuyu’s. This is what Uenoyama wanted, to kiss him, to feel him, to taste him, to have him all for himself. At least for one night before the hardships that the end of the year will bring with it. 

The two kiss a bit too passionately, Mafuyu’s avid warmth clashing against Uenoyama’s frigid nervousness. Uenoyama opens his eyes for a brief second, only to check if this is real; he wants it to be real. Because it feels so good to be with Mafuyu. He gets his confirmation when he senses Mafuyu placing his warm hands on his chest. In a moment of complete vulnerability, Uenoyama’s knees go weak. As if being able to detect that in his partner, Mafuyu seizes the opportunity and pushes him down on the bench. 

„I wanted to do this ever since I saw you, Uenoyama-kun,” Mafuyu admits and places himself on Uenoyama’s lap.

„I didn’t know you liked cowboys so much,” Uenoyama says and drags his thumb across Mafuyu’s lips. So soft, he thinks and narrows his eyes, completely smitten.

„I like you, Uenoyama-kun.”

Mafuyu closes his eyes and allows himself to be kissed however Uenoyama wants. His experience might be limited, but the passion and determination are definitely there. Uenoyama is holding tightly onto Mafuyu, pulling him close to his chest, and Mafuyu doesn’t oppose it. Uenoyama’s hand begins exploring Mafuyu’s back. He swallows a gasp when he learns how sensitive Mafuyu is, quick to respond to every one of his touches, flinching and grunting whenever Uenoyama drags his fingers over a delicate spot. 

„Don’t you want to sit here beside me?” Uenoyama offers, noticing how easy it is to get lost in the moment, panting, ecstasy pulsating in his veins.

„No,” Mafuyu says impulsively and grabs Uenoyama’s hand and redirects it under his shirt. 

Uenoyama is surprised by the softness of his skin and becomes eager to grab at it, to make the boy in his lap even more enthralled to the way he touches him. Many things were going through Uenoyama’s mind in those moments, most of which not even he could make sense of. One thing was clear, though, the alcohol eliminated many of his inhibitions; he has never been braver in the way he allowed himself to touch Mafuyu. 

Uenoyama wants to release Mafuyu from his past. He wants to dominate Mafuyu’s mind and heart, to make him have his eyes on him, only look at him, desire him — him, and nobody else. 

Uenoyama wants Mafuyu to see the present. Recognizing how well he responded to his touches, Uenoyama presses on, ensnared, seduced, and absorbed by the Mafuyu’s scent and the fire within his stomach, which Mafuyu was feeding with his deep kisses. 

Uenoyama wants Mafuyu to look forward to a future together with him.

Mafuyu opens his eyes and sighs softly. He lifts his hands to Uenoyama’s collar and keeps them there. There is a hesitation in how he is replying to Uenoyama’s affection, but Uenoyama is slow to notice it. 

Still drunk on the euphoria of their embrace, he presses on. Uenoyama lunges greedily for Mafuyu’s lips, kissing them repeatedly, and then takes those kisses down to his jawline. As if drawn by the warmth, he lowers his lips even more. He continues his exploration by dragging his tongue along the lines of Mafuyu’s neck. In a moment of complete haze, Uenoyama parts his lips, feeling the desire to take a bite of his flesh as well, wondering if his neck is just as sweet as the rest of him.

Mafuyu jolts briefly, sensing Uenoyama’s bold approach, which sends his heart thumping. Despite his insistence and gentleness, though, Mafuyu turned unresponsive to Uenoyama’s gestures of affection. Mafuyu moves away from him and pushes on his chest, his desire to put distance between them so obvious now that it begins to irritate Uenoyama. 

„Are you ashamed to be seen with me?”

The question comes out of nowhere, and it makes Uenoyama’s eyes widen.

„No, what — what are you talking about?” Uenoyama asks, and all the passionate frenzy that animated him dissipates so quickly it is as though the fire within him never ignited in the first place.

„We're hiding, Uenoyama-kun,” Mafuyu gives him a faintly vulnerable look.

Uenoyama swallows, feeling strangely apprehensive.

„We've been hiding the entire evening,” Mafuyu utters, his tone still a little curt.

Uenoyama frowns and glances away from Mafuyu’s persistent stare. 

„Are we always going to be hiding?”

Mafuyu’s words strike Uenoyama through his chest and end by piercing his heart. He realizes his selfish thoughts and feels terrible for thinking like that; and, in a way, guilty because he was never able to bring himself to admit his insecurities to Mafuyu. 

„It’s not like that,” Uenoyama stirs, opening his mouth, his gaze quick to lock onto Mafuyu’s. „Listen to me. You're really important to me, but there's still a lot of distance between us. I might not know everything there is to know about you and your troubles, but if you'd allow me, I’d like to.”

Uenoyama searches his gaze, quick to wonder if his words are reaching him or are gliding past his ears. „You said that the world still goes on with or without you,” Uenoyama presses, Mafuyu’s disgruntled face something that made him his heart twinge, „but I don't want that to be the case. Because I am here too,” Uenoyama says and grabs Mafuyu’s hand and the boy jolts. „I might not know what to do or say at times, but that’s not because I don’t love you. And because I do, I want to help you with anything that’s troubling you — so that one day you may overcome it.”

„Uenoyama-kun,” Mafuyu murmurs, lowering his head and tightening his grip onto Uenoyama’s hand.

„What’s wrong?” Uenoyama then asks, finding it difficult to read his face, although he can spot the way he twisted his lips slightly as though considering something too complex to explain through words.

„Nothing,” he stirs, pushing his head deeper between the spot where Uenoyama’s neck and shoulder met.

„Are you ok?”

„Yeah.”

„Then, why are you crying?”

Mafuyu is weeping silently, often sniffing as to try and calm himself. Uenoyama huffs out a laugh and wraps his arms around the boy. He then pulls him to his chest, feeling Mafuyu’s tears soaking in his shoulder. 

It's not like Mafuyu to be this emotional, Uenoyama thinks, but neither am I. It's at that point that Uenoyama became aware that the vodka in Mafuyu's orange juice might’ve triggered something that neither of them was prepared to handle. But in a way, Uenoyama doesn't regret it; he got to see a side of Mafuyu he hasn’t seen before, and at the same time, Mafuyu got to hear Uenoyama confess.

„You said you love me,” Mafuyu utters softly, lifting his reddened eyes at the dark-haired boy.

„I did because I do. Very much,” Uenoyama smiles and goes to wipe away a tear from his cheek. „The alcohol might’ve made me braver to approach you, but the words are my own.”

Uenoyama’s heartfelt confession ends up warming up Mafuyu’s heart. He feels his face redden and uses the momentum to free himself from Uenoyama’s arms and lifts his eyes at him. Seeing Mafuyu’s persistent gaze, Uenoyama braces himself, unaware of his intention.

„Well, Uenoyama-kun, I also — ”

Maufyu stops midsentence. He pales as his eyes widen. Uenoyama is quick to make sense of Mafuyu’s startled expression; he has seen it many times in his friends and reacts swiftly. He helps the boy off of his lap and clutches tightly onto him, Mafuyu’s movement wobbly and uncoordinated.

„It’s ok; I got you. I’ll hold your cape too,” Uenoyama says as he instructs him to lean forward.

Mafuyu’s stomach isn’t prepared to deal with so much alcohol, and despite putting up a good fight against it, even it knew when to admit defeat. Mafuyu ends up vomiting everything he drank that evening.

„I’m so sorry,” Mafuyu says, his whole body shaking after standing back up. „That orange juice was weird.”

„Yeah, no more orange juice for you from now on,” Uenoyama speaks tersely, rubbing Mafuyu’s back.

Mafuyu’s hand is clutching at Uenoyama’s jacket, holding tightly as if for dear life. Uenoyama sits the boy back on the bench and grants him a few moments to catch his breath.

„I’ll bring you some water,” Uenoyama offers and stands up, unable to sit idly, knowing Mafuyu is in distress.

„No, Uenoyama-kun,” Mafuyu jolts up but is too stunned to move any further. He falls back on the bench, his hand still reaching out for Uenoyama. „Don’t leave.”

„It’s ok; I’ll be back real quick,” Uenoyama slides Mafuyu’s fringe to the side so that his lips can touch his forehead before turning. „I promise, so don’t move.”

Uenoyama rushes back into the house. He jumps past people, doing his best to avoid anybody who might know him. There is quite a crowd around the bar, but while everybody is reaching for the alcohol, the bottles of water are unhindered. He grabs one and turns on his feet, careful as to not stumble into anybody who was clumsier than he was. Just as he is reaching for the door, Uenoyama looks down at his feet. He nods, having undertaken another mission.

By the time Uenoyama returns, Mafuyu is lounging on the bench, so much so he was about to fall off of it. He is staring at the sky, his big eyes focused, and yet lost at the same time due to the immensity of the space above him. 

„There you go,” Uenoyama says and hands him a bottle of water. He looks exhausted, Uenoyama thinks.

Mafuyu nods briefly and accepts the bottle, his fingers grazing Uenoyama’s as the exchanged happened. „Thank you.”

„Of course. Oh, and I brought your shoes too. Here, let me help you,” Uenoyama speaks, and Mafuyu sits up from his lazy position.

Mafuyu’s eyes are glued to Uenoyama, who's determined to be as gentle as possible when putting Mafuyu’s shoes on. He never had to do this to anybody else but himself and found the experience rather complicated. But he doesn't mind. As long as it’s him, I’ll do my best, Uenoyama thinks. After he fastens Mafuyu’s shoelaces, Uenoyama stands up proudly.

„You were supposed to drink that, you know,” Uenoyama points irritably to the unopened bottle of water.

„I want to sleep,” Mafuyu groans drowsily.

„Drink your water first, and then you can lean on me and recharge for a while,” Uenoyama seizes the moment and sits down on the bench beside Mafuyu. „When you feel a bit better, we can start making our way home.”

Mafuyu nods clumsily and pats the bench in search of the bottle of water. It opens with a loud popping sound, and he drinks the entirety of the bottle in one go. Mafuyu wipes his mouth with his sleeve and pants as he leans back on the bench once more. 

There’s a brisk wind stirring dead leaves along the stone path before their feet. They say nothing for a long moment, choosing to enjoy the night’s refreshing breeze, cooling them down, and appeasing their spirits.

„Will you walk me home?” Mafuyu asks, nudging Uenoyama’s shoulder with his forehead.

Uenoyama nods, his body’s motion reassuring Mafuyu, who draws a quick, short breath.

„Thank you, Uenoyama-kun. Can we hold hands too?” Mafuyu prompts after a brief pause.

Uenoyama flinches as his eyes dart to Mafuyu’s and quickly away again. 

„Ah, no; maybe that’s — ” Mafuyu stutters and retreats.

Uenoyama swallows. Mafuyu’s pushiness knows no bound, Uenoyama thinks critically. He grits his teeth and takes in a deep breath. It’s then he forces himself to nod calmly once more.

„Thank you,” Mafuyu lowers his head, fidgeting excitedly.

„You can stop thanking me,” Uenoyama replies and slides his hand around Mafuyu’s slender back. „I wouldn’t have the heart to leave you like this on your own anyway.”

Uenoyama blushes. Mafuyu smiles and closes his eyes as he gets comfortable with his head against Uenoyama’s side. They are so close together, Uenoyma can’t help himself and reaches out with his fingers towards Mafuyu’s hand, which is resting just a bit away from him. Despite his weary state, Mafuyu senses Uenoyama’s intention and meets him halfway. They intertwine their fingers and stay like that, able to enjoy each other’s company. It’s not until Uenoyama hears his sister yelling out for him that he jolts and lifts his head, looking to catch her attention.

„Ah, there you are. We were about to leave without you,” Yayoi says and approaches Ritsuka, signaling behind her. „Is he ok?” she then asks, tilting her head to investigate Mafuyu.

„Yeah, just tired. It’s been a long night,” Ritsuka explains and gently nudges Mafuyu awake.

„Aww, the poor baby isn’t used to all-nighters, is he?” Haruki says, appearing from a spot behind Yayoi and grinning at Mafuyu, who was rubbing his eyes awake.

„Neither are you, Haruki,” Akihiko speaks out from the patio, exhaling a cloud of smoke, „you're usually in bed by nine-thirty.”

„Akihiko! TMI, TMI,” Haruki turns to him and pleads desperately. 

Akihiko smirks as if it was his mission that entire time to embarrass Haruki or at least cause a reaction in him. So adorable, he thinks, a hint of pride glimmering in his eyes.

Yayoi is so quick to notice how affectionately Akihiko's looking at Haruki that, in a way, she can't help but be jealous even if just slightly; he never looked at her with the same eyes. However, she knows it isn't her place to comment. Plus, there's another who she's interested in now. There's someone else she likes. In a way, she needed to spend this evening without him to realize how much she came to miss Take. In her heart, she's counting the minutes until morning came. So that she can call Take and schedule a date. So that she can see him again.

„Ready to go?” Uenoyama asks Mafuyu and helps him off the bench, offering him his hand.

Mafuyu nods and utters a messy „yes.” The two join the others on the walkway, Uenoyama not letting go of Mafuyu’s hand, not even for a moment, despite his sister's suspicious glances.

„We seriously have to do this again; it was too much fun!” Haruki cheers and turns to the others. After seeing their worn-out expressions, a sense of self-satisfaction flashes across his face. The graces of youth are on my side, Haruki thinks and clenches his first, savoring a personal victory.

„Haruki-san, you have some white powder on your neck,” Mafuyu lifts his eyes and says curtly in a brief moment of clarity before his head collapses again, causing Uenoyama to jolt and fasten his grip on his slender body.

„Ah, do I?” He asks absentmindedly, dragging the tips of his fingers along the lines of his neck. „Oh, I—I, well, it must be from the cupcakes,” Haruki says, flustered, rubbing away at the powder with both his hands. „Yeah, that’s right — powdered sugar from the cupcakes.”

„Didn’t Haruki-san say that he didn't want any pastries?” Uenoyama mutters mostly to himself. „Oh well, maybe he changed his mind.” 

Despite his hazy state, Mafuyu catches Uenoyama’s words. „There were no sugar powdered cupcakes. I know that for certain because — ”

„It’s ok, Mafuyu,” Akihiko interrupts him by jumping over and ruffling his hair a bit too insistently, „don’t force yourself to speak. You need to save up your energy; you must be so tired.” 

Haruki’s victory was bitterly short-lived. There's only so much teasing he can endure for an evening, and much to his surprise, even Akihiko knew where to draw the line. Not to mention, whatever happened between them that night was a story for another time.

* * * * *


End file.
